As It Is - No Way Out

Inside as the rain came pouring down 

It can’t wash away all this hurt that haunts me now 

Inside as the rain came pouring down 

I’m losing touch with the only soul I’ve found 

Desperate delusions are all I have 

Just to keep me hanging on 

I shut my eyes, but my world’s still burning 

I can’t escape, I feel it killing me 

No way out 

Here I am again 

Choked up, but the pain came after all 

I feel displaced in these once familiar walls 

Patient I fall with no end in sight 

And the noose around my neck 

And as I let hindsight translate nightmares into reality, I begin to see myself for who I truly was, somebody desperate, somebody entirely out of their depth, somebody beyond their abilities to cope. And as I exhale out the pain, I’m digesting the severity of the depression I felt, the extent to which it claimed a piece of me, how it’s left me emotionally vacant and painfully numb. And now together, my faults and my thoughts prey on me like vultures, creeping from their comfortable distance, never once exiting my line of vision. And the facade I invite to amble whilst wearing my skin, he isn’t me and he never will be me. And I know that I fucked up, but I want to grow from it. 

I find myself in the same dark ending 

I can’t escape, I feel it killing me 

No way out